Helping Boys Get Organized

Experts are finding that more and more middle school boys are struggling with the organizational demands of school. Renowned child psychologist and author Michael Thompson, PhD, explains, “They flounder when they have lockers and have to move from room to room throughout the day.” While this isn’t exclusive to boys—girls too feel the pressure of having to transition from and carry books for multiple classes—the problem seems to be somewhat more prevalent in boys of this age.

Ana Homayoun, and an education consultant and author of That Crumpled Paper was Due Last Week: Helping Disorganized and Distracted Boys Succeed in School and Life, has worked with many high school and middle school boys over the years. Homayoun says these boys all were intelligent and capable, but just had a very difficult time with the organizational requirements of school. She believes that boys, like all children in general, need specifics when trying to organize themselves. That’s where parents come in—you can help your son do better in school by helping him get organized with the following tips. The only catch? Your son has to be on board too or all your efforts won’t amount to much.

Start at the Beginning
While it may seem obvious, start by looking at the main goals. Homayoun suggests you sit down with your children and ask what they want to accomplish, and even make a list. She says boys often are results oriented, so providing a tangible goal is a good way to get them motivated and invested.

Find the Right Fit
Even the most complex organizer/planner with multiple dividers and folders won’t work if it doesn’t address the particular concerns and challenges your child has. Remember that this is about your child meeting his goals, rather than following the kind of organizational system that works for you or others. Work with him to find a personalized solution that he will be comfortable using and sticking with for the long haul. For those who are reluctant, you can always point out that the more organized he is, the sooner he can move on from school work to his own interests and hobbies.

Take Small Steps
Homayoun warns of setting a too general and high-reaching goal to start with. For example, “getting straight A’s” may be both too general and may set up your child to feel like a failure if they make one small mistake. Instead, set smaller and more attainable goals, allowing you and your son to acknowledge progress, and build up to larger goals in more manageable steps. Homayoun suggests goals like keeping a set time of the week for homework and sticking to it every night, or something simple but crucial like making sure the homework planner is updated and referenced every day.

Keep Work Focused
When your child does finally sit down, organized and ready to tackle homework, do him the favor of removing as many distractions as you can. Move the cell phone, computer, TV—anything that may take him off track of his homework and studying. This may mean working in the dining room or other spot that’s removed from technology. Having a set place like this for homework can help set up a consistent routine and environment that makes it easier to sustain the organization you and son have worked toward.

Lastly, be gentle and forgiving. We all make mistakes, so if your son gets lost a bit don’t panic. Move back to basic goals, making sure the planners are up to date, papers are organized, et cetera. Sometimes it’s helpful to set up a weekly organization time, where you go through all the papers together and look at what due dates are coming up both short- and long-term. And don’t forget to give praise. It may sound silly, but we all function better when we are recognized for our efforts. The more you praise your son’s good habits, the more likely he will want to continue them, to please you and to make his own life more efficient and orderly.

Source: Williams, Julie. “Organizing for Boys: What Parents Need to Know.” education.com.